A Third Culture Kid*
My mom loves plants. When we lived in Cameroon, everywhere you looked in our yard there were splashes of vibrant colors. One of my favorite flowers she planted was a little blue hydrangea. On the other side of the globe, my grandmother also had hydrangeas blooming in her yard. Only she had pink hydrangeas as well. Apparently, the acidity of the soil determines the color the hydrangeas will be. So, in Cameroon, the soil turned our hydrangeas a blue hue. At my grandma’s… pinkish.
“Okay… That’s nice that your family likes flowers, Lydia, but where is this going….?”
Well… I feel like people are kind of like hydrangeas. We tend to bloom a certain way based on the type of soil we’re planted in. Let’s say in America, people “bloom” pink. And in Cameroon—blue. I am an American. However, the greater part of my life has been spent overseas. So, I don’t “bloom” pink. But, I’m not Cameroonian either. So, no blue “blossoms” either.
I’m purple.
I’m not from culture/ Country/soil #1. I’m not from culture/country/soil #2. I’m a third culture kid. Sort of a mix of the two, but kind of its own thing at the same time.
As TCK’s we get to experience the diversity of cultures. Every culture has its own “sub” culture. I’ve heard the metaphor of an iceberg. There’s the part you can see clearly jutting out of the water. But, there’s also the part that’s submerged beneath the depths. Sometimes, it’s hard to navigate those waters. Honestly, sometimes I’d rather sit on the shore of familiarity than wade into the waters of the unknown. I think this is an area that a lot of TCK’s struggle with. I think that contributes to the reason why we can be in a room full of chattering people and feel entirely alone.
I’ve referenced the incredible potholes in Cameroon before. They are bone rattling… to say the least. Occasionally, when we would drive at night in Cameroon, we would have the good fortune to drive right behind a taxi. Why was that so great? Well, those taxi men always know where the potholes are. Even when the road is dark, they swerve and careen around those craters like no body’s business. How do they know? Because they have driven those roads. Again. And again. And again.
I think sometimes, you just have to get on the road and drive. You can’t avoid the potholes if you don’t know where there are. (Well, in Cameroon you can’t avoid most potholes even when you do know where they are. ;))
Yeah, you’re probably going to say something stupid. You really aren’t going to get all the jokes. Maybe you won’t understand why those people love that thing so much. Or… the list continues. But God has created so many beautiful people. There are so many things to learn about those people through their culture. Sometimes, I learn things about myself along the way as well! God has given us the opportunity to learn and experience incredible things. And sometimes its scary. I’ll be honest, I’ve run into that submerged iceberg so many times. But that’s okay. We’re not “Titanics”. :) God’s not going to let us sink to the bottom of the ocean. In fact, it’s quite the opposite. He says: “Be strong and of a good courage, fear not, nor be afraid of them: for the Lord thy God, he it is that doth go with thee; he will not fail thee, nor forsake thee” (Deut. 31:6).
There is SO much more that could be said about the “Third-culturedness” of TCKs. I’ve been a TCK for my whole life—17 years. And I still have so much to learn. But thanks for reading and I hope you have a blessed journey on “this road we travel…”
* A third culture kid is a kid who has spent a large part of his/her life in a different country than that of his/her nationality. Or, different than his/her passport country.
“Passport country” refers to the country where the kid’s passport is from. Or the nationality of the kid.
“Host country” refers to the “foreign” country where the kids actually lives. The kid’s culture is not entirely from the passport country or host country. There’s a third culture that the kid identifies with. It’s a kind of mix of the two, but its own entity at the same time. Overseas military kids, social worker’s kids, and missionary kids are just three examples of TCKs. There are also ATCKs. Adult Third Culture Kids. (Just thought I would define some of the terminology that you’ll probably see in this blog.)